3eb: The Movie

[spoonman]

since everyone's really bored waiting for march i decided to start my own lame thread.

if there was a Third Eye Brine movie, who would you choose to act as all the band members, who would you pick to direct, and what do you think the script would be like ?


i think they should get kevin bacon to play kevin. and maculay culkin to play JT Leroy.

Jennifer Aniston as Vanessa.



btw merry christmas

[bluewintermoon]

Originally posted by spoonman
if there was a Third Eye Brine movie, who would you choose to act as all the band members?

Uhhh, let's see, I'd get the Red Lobster shrimp mascot to play Stephan, um, the Sea Monkey dad to play Tony, a pickle to play Brad, annnnd... LOL, wtf dude, "brine"? C'mon.

[Leigh]

Dougray Scott as Stephan
Oded Fehr as Arion
Brad Pitt as Tony
Michael Vartan as Kevin
Joseph Fiennes as Brad

:D

[iamofthesky]

Originally posted by bluewintermoon
a pickle to play Brad

Bwah!!!!!


Originally posted by LeighASU Michael Vartan as Kevin

I see Michael Vartan as Brad, actually.
James Woods as Kevin.
my friend Ziad as Arion, because I always thought he had an Arioness to him...
Giovanni Ribisi as Tony
Jim Carrey as Stephan (heh)
Soleil Moon Frye as Vanessa
Charlize Theron as herself

[iamofthesky]

Originally posted by Simon
One of the Olsen twins as Vanessa Carlton.

Or maybe they can alternate playing Vanessa. Because you know how they can't play in a single show or film without the other...

[bluewintermoon]

Originally posted by iamofthesky
James Woods as Kevin.

I always said Kevin looks like a younger James Woods. James Woods is sexy. Hehe.

I think Paul Rudd should play Stephan. He looks just like him, when he had long hair.

I don't know about the others, but Simon, good call on Jason Slater. LOL

[dani]

Seth Green as Tony.

Tony ALWAYS makes me think of Seth Green

[Bob Mackie]

Originally posted by iamofthesky
Or maybe they can alternate playing Vanessa. Because you know how they can't play in a single show or film without the other...
Or if we film this in 1 year, 5 months and 22 days when the Olsen twins turn 18, maybe there could be a little sub-plot of two fans (played by the Olsen twins) who love the 3eb so much they decided to flash Stephan at the concerts! ;)

[dani]

Originally posted by Bob Mackie
Or if we film this in 1 year, 5 months and 22 days when the Olsen twins turn 18, maybe there could be a little sub-plot of two fans (played by the Olsen twins) who love the 3eb so much they decided to flash Stephan at the concerts! ;)

I think we could probably get some skanky fans to do that for free, dontchya think?

I can think of a few.

[Apoc]

If it is considered a documentary we could have them topless even before they turn 18.

[bluewintermoon]

Originally posted by dani
I think we could probably get some skanky fans to do that for free, dontchya think?

I can think of a few.

Yeah, but I think Bob was talking about fans that aren't old and gross whores.

[dani]

Originally posted by bluewintermoon
Yeah, but I think Bob was talking about fans that aren't old and gross whores.

ooops. my bad.

[ZGreedyFly]

How about Christopher Walken as the evil Elektra manager?

[Punkadelica]

Originally posted by ZGreedyFly
How about Christopher Walken as the evil Elektra manager?

Or Geoffrey Rush. Or Satan. Or Michael Jackson.

[spoonman]

christopher walken ? wasn't he the evil record executive in waynes world 2 ?

that would be pretty interesting.

i just realized dougray scott looks almost exactly like stephan. Blue-era stephan. maybe its just the hair.

since we've all seen movies about zeroes turning into heroes, like 8 mile and Rock Star, i think it would be cool if the plot was like a behind the scenes documentary movie about ... why the album is taking so long.


there could be these scenes where the computer illiterate band tries to operate a PC and reads fan message boards and they go:

"oh shit, everyone really hates the title crystal baller.. and they keep bitching about the photos we send them.. and they think JT is a wussy. jeez. nice fans."

and then they post on the msg boards but nobody believes its them.

and there could be a sub plot about stephans break up and his new chick and his sleazy appearance on howard stern. except it would be more funny if stephan and howard got in a fight at the radio station..

Howard Stern: "i like to toss the salad, i'm horny. i like the wait, just save me the charlie brownies.."

Stephan: "hey fuck you !! i can't take it anymore, she's the most wonderful person, she would never give in to your seductive powers !!"

*pow whiz bang !!* (60s batman style with trumpets)

Howard has Stephan in a head lock...

Stephan: "pant pant.. y'know you've got such nice soft beautiful hair.."

Howard Stern: "i use head and shoulders. wanna sniff ?"


i think that would be an awesome movie.

[Apoc]

Originally posted by spoonman
christopher walken ? wasn't he the evil record executive in waynes world 2 ?
Walken is evil in most movies he is in. Back when he host SNL about 5 or so years ago he made a big joke about this.

[Apoc]

I don't remember, but probably.

I just remember that it was in the Spring of '97 because of something I was doing after every SNL episode back then - play Civ2. I immediately remember playing Civ2 after thinking about Walken being on SNL so that is how I make the connect. Odd, but it works.

[Jenkinator3eb]

Originally posted by bluewintermoon


I think Paul Rudd should play Stephan. He looks just like him, when he had long hair.


I could so see that. When I look at him he reminds me of Stephan.

Jack Black as Steve Harwell would be hilarious

[Will]

i'll play poor little timmy the criple who stephan helped reach his dreams of getting a hip replacement with the money from the Self-Titled album.

[Read JDM]

It's Third Eye Blind: The Movie!

With Kevin Cadogan as "Tony Fredianelli"...

Jason Slater as "Arion Salazar"...

Michael Urbano as "Brad Hargreaves"...

Introducing Charlize Theron as "Vanessa Carlton"...

And starring Michael Clark Duncan as "Stephan Jenkins"

[Will]

and michael caine as Mr Jenkins senior,

"ello, my name is Mr Jenkins, not alot of people know that!"

and

"you were on supposesed to tour with the girl........................................... not blow off her doors"


i know how lame that is but lets just leave it out, ok?

[2pacsnotdead]

Originally posted by Read JDM
It's Third Eye Blind: The Movie!

With Kevin Cadogan as "Tony Fredianelli"...

Jason Slater as "Arion Salazar"...

Michael Urbano as "Brad Hargreaves"...

Introducing Charlize Theron as "Vanessa Carlton"...

And starring Michael Clark Duncan as "Stephan Jenkins"

HEH!

at least you didn't say Tony Fredianelli as "Kevin Cadogan" :p

[Read JDM]

Seriously, though, can you imagine Michael Clark Duncan playing Stephan Jenkins on stage? I'd pay to see that. I'd pay in a heartbeat. He's a mighty fine actor, you know.

[Leigh]

Going with Vicki's suggestion about Michael Vartan being Brad instead of Kevin, I present my cast:

http://ourworld.cs.com/underadesertstar/3ebmovie.jpg

:D

Some possible titles:
- Unfortunately We're Not Naked
- Hey, It's Better Than Rockstar!
- 3EB, the movie. Yes, It Took 4 Years to Film
- Blue Blind Ballers

[iamofthesky]

That oddly does look like 3eb. Brad Pitt as Tony. Hehehe. ;)


Originally posted by LeighASU


Some possible titles:
- 3EB, the movie. Yes, It Took 4 Years to Film
- Blue Blind Ballers

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!

[Matt]

Originally posted by Read JDM
It's Third Eye Blind: The Movie!

With Kevin Cadogan as "Tony Fredianelli"...

Jason Slater as "Arion Salazar"...

Michael Urbano as "Brad Hargreaves"...

Introducing Charlize Theron as "Vanessa Carlton"...

And starring Michael Clark Duncan as "Stephan Jenkins"


Oh my god, that is the funniest thing I have ever read on this forum.

[ZGreedyFly]

Oh my god Leigh, that is so funny! I thought that was an actual Stephan pic for a second.

[Bob Mackie]

LOL Yeah!! Those pictures are awesome! The Arion actor looks a little rough though. ;)

[spoonman]

hey your arion guy looks a bit like jesus.

[ZGreedyFly]

Isn't he from The Mummy?

[Adam]

No, he was in "The Bible."

[bluewintermoon]

Originally posted by Adam
No, he was in "The Bible."

*spews water* ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh sweet holy christ, where's that pee emoticon when you need it?

[one_girl]

LOL!!! This thread is by far the funniest thing I've read in a long time!
Although I would pay good money to see a movie with Michael Vartan and Brad Pitt in it. If we could fit Orlando Bloom in somewhere, it would be perfect....:D

[gowiththemartyr]

hey, that guy does look like Stephan! LOL!!! and Tony is hot in that movie, I'd do him :D and Brad has hair once again, that oughtta make him happy.

I have some guy in mind for Kevin but I can't remember his name, so I'll have to look it up.

The best part of a 3eb movie: fans will get the chance to offer themselves as extras. Maybe it'll be bought by HBO or something.

[Leigh]

*curtsy* Dougray is sooo Stephan unless he opens his mouth. Hopefully he'd be able to do the accent properly.

We could just have a special segment where 3EB meets all the webmasters and stuff and Orlando could play someone, whether it be Brian or a member of Jen's harem of men :D

And hey, if it's bought by HBO...we get nudity!

[gowiththemartyr]

Maybe Orlando Bloom can play Tony's brother and play on stage and have some backstage drama with hot teenage fans or some not so teenage ones. :D I'd volunteer for that, anyone with me?


And the actor to play Kevin: James Spader. He looks a bit like him.

[spoonman]

Originally posted by gowiththemartyr
and Brad has hair once again, that oughtta make him happy.


i can imagine a sad brad looking at his compooter screen on christmas day wishing he wore a hat in all the photo shoots.. at least he can grow facial hair right ??


And hey, if it's bought by HBO...we get nudity!

i think stephan would look better with clothes on. i mean, he's .. an old guy. ... ugh.

and the fans.. well. i hope 3eb has no fat goth fans (kelly osporne?) those are pretty nasty.

actually, a majority of people in this world Really Look Better With Their Clothes On. unless you're a celeb or model. but that's all liposuction and silicone and steroids anyway.


no i'm not insecure about my penis length. go away.

[Will]

Originally posted by gowiththemartyr
. :D I'd volunteer for that, anyone with me?



yes............................................... ...........i mean no, opps:(

[Jenkinator3eb]

Originally posted by gowiththemartyr
Maybe Orlando Bloom can play Tony's brother and play on stage and have some backstage drama with hot teenage fans or some not so teenage ones. :D I'd volunteer for that, anyone with me?




Orlando Bloon is beautiful!

[Flash of Light]

Originally posted by spoonman
hey your arion guy looks a bit like jesus.

LMAO!!!!!! he does!!!!!! orlando bloom would be awesome in the movie...but i cant see him as anyone. all i can picture is him shooting arrows at orcs, LOL. i think orlando bloom looks better with blonde hair...anyone agree???

[Bob Mackie]

I'm not trying to turn this to a theological conversation, but was it ever agreed that we know what Jesus looks like?

[Apoc]

Originally posted by Bob Mackie
I'm not trying to turn this to a theological conversation, but was it ever agreed that we know what Jesus looks like?
Nope.

It isn't just Jesus people can't agree on. There is much debate over the look of many other historical figures such as Cleopatra and Alexander the Great. The problem is migration of various ethnic groups so that the group currently living in a certain area is different from the one that was there at the time of the historical figure. Another problem is just that painters and other artists typically draw these figures of their own ethnic group. It isn't necessarily the case that they want to claim this person in their ethnic group. Many times they are just painting and creating what they normally do.

[2pacsnotdead]

Originally posted by Bob Mackie
I'm not trying to turn this to a theological conversation, but was it ever agreed that we know what Jesus looks like?

I would imagine that since Jesus is from the middle east that he'd probably blend in pretty well in there if he still hangs out today.

I have a friend who was dead for 5 minutes and came back to life after about 3 epi shots and a lot of tired EMT's revived her.
She said while she was dead she saw her mother who had passed away earlier this year, Jesus, and some other people. She said all that could have been just her imagination but she's not sure. She couldn't really make out what Jesus looked like because he was all full of light and stuff and she was mostly trying to talk to her mom anyway and kinda not paying attention to him. maybe that's why he sent her back ;)

[Flash of Light]

HAHA! but that's kinda creepy ya know ... seeing death and then come back to tell about it. i've always wanted to know what its like after death...but im not jus about to kill myself in order to find out though... :rolleyes:

[one_girl]

Originally posted by Flash of Light
LMAO!!!!!! he does!!!!!! orlando bloom would be awesome in the movie...but i cant see him as anyone. all i can picture is him shooting arrows at orcs, LOL. i think orlando bloom looks better with blonde hair...anyone agree???
Not to detract from this intellegent Jesus conversation, but I sort of like Orlando Bloom with dark hair. I kind of go for the tall, dark and mysterious myself.

[Will]

Originally posted by Flash of Light
HAHA! but that's kinda creepy ya know ... seeing death and then come back to tell about it. i've always wanted to know what its like after death...but im not jus about to kill myself in order to find out though... :rolleyes:


i think the whole lfe after death think is kinda stupid, i mean the fact that you die kinda suggest that thats it! no more life! of course i would love to be reincarnated!

[Bob Mackie]

Because worms are slimy and icky!

[spoonman]

Originally posted by 3eb_fan_uk
i think the whole lfe after death think is kinda stupid, i mean the fact that you die kinda suggest that thats it! no more life! of course i would love to be reincarnated!


do yourself a favour and ask your neighborhood pastor what that's all about.


i guess nobody really knows what jesus looks like. all we know is he had pretty dirty feet.



PRAISE GOD !!

[eyewind]

Originally posted by spoonman


i guess nobody really knows what jesus looks like. all we know is he had pretty dirty feet.



lol...*little happy face rolls around on the floor*